Lockdown Relationship Tips
Distance makes the heart grow fonder. Oh, how true that quote is right now.
Being stuck indoors with a partner can be lovely and it can also
be hell put strain on your relationship.
Let’s face it, keeping a cool head at the best of times is hard enough. What with the added stressors of sharing the living room as an office, hearing them gulp every sip of tea and subconsciously analysing their toilet roll usage – being stuck indoors with your partner 24/7 can be intense to say the least.
Firstly, know that we’re all in a similar boat/flat. It may look like famous faces or friends are having a fantastic, lovey dovey and connected time together, but don’t buy it. They’ll also be bickering and huffing between each picture taken or video shot.
It’s human nature to react in a fight or flight manner when forced into an unnatural situation for too long. Our senses are heightened and on high alert. And this can be draining, stressful and as a result, naturally cause strain on a previously calm relationship.
We’ve got 3 tips to help you stay calmer with one another and maintain a somewhat harmonised balance. (Disclaimer: these tips won’t work miracles.)
Relationship Tip 1: Create An Invisible ‘Lodger’
You’re probably thinking ‘wtf are you on about?’ However, one of our Peaksters has a phenomenal idea you might just like.
What is it?
Choose the invisible lodger’s name. Take for example Boris, Greg, Hercules, Donald or Lizard. Imagine this lodger to be slightly irresponsible and often lazy around the household.
Lizard can sometimes leave the loo seat up, leave cups out, make you feel unnecessarily hot-headed about something. So, each time you want to ‘have a go’ at your partner for doing something that has tested your nerves, blame the lodger. BAD LODGER!
And in the words of the Peakster themselves:
“Get an intern! We have an imaginary intern who we blame all sorts of things on from leaving the dishes out to forgetting to put the toilet seat down. Keeps us sane. If only we could afford to hire imaginary HR.”
Just be mindful that this doesn’t excuse excessive slobby behaviour.
Relationship Tip 2: Swap Your Work Spaces
This one is straight forward. If you’re fortunate enough to have a study or another space besides your kitchen/living room to work, or if you’ve got your bedroom and kitchen to choose from, this tip is for you.
Swap your working zones with your partner. It doesn’t have to be every day, but every 2 or 3 days.
Sharing your spaces will loosen the tendency to want to claim a particular space as your own and become territorial over it.
Cats that have been forced to share spaces with other cats can get stressed and anxious and the same can be seen in humans. However, if you learn to swap and share work spaces then these territories will become shared environments. You’ll be more relaxed, your brain should love the change and it may give you that boost you need.
Relationship Tip 3: Connect At Least Three Times A Day
You may eat your meals together and perhaps sleep in the same bed, but we think you need to up the connection time. Diana Earl from The University of Queensland says that “human connection fuels a sense of belonging, comfort and general wellbeing.” And it’s safe to say we need an injection of all 3 of those things right now.
How Can You Connect More?
Share a coffee break with your partner and talk about something warming like their family, something a friend did or how unusual a colleague looks on camera.
Another way to connect is by walking and talking together. We often open our hearts up if we don’t have someone staring at our face. If you can get out to walk, then open up about things troubling you. It’s the perfect time.
It’s also a boost to message one another as you would if you were in the office. Keep that conversation and part of your relationship alive. Who cares if they’re just next door?
Like we said, these tips aren’t going to work miracles, but what they can do is show you small ways which may help you stay more positive and most importantly, level-headed.
Stay tuned for more tips coming your way.